Anatomical Brain Pendant
The Anatomical Brain Pendant is the pinnacle of zombie-obsession. Okay, maybe not the pinnacle, but you know what I mean. The pinnacle is the Blood Energy Drink, which still gives me the Willies. ”I wish you wouldn’t use that expression – it’s offensive.” Look, Willy, this is something you need to take up with your parents – I wasn’t the one who named you Willy. Just do what Moby Dick did! *In the courtroom* “So, Mr. Moby Dick, you would like …
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NoiseHush NX22 Stereo Headphones Review
Note: I received the NoiseHush NX22 from a distributor, but I am not biased. Not biased, because I say what I want, when I want, how I want to say it. CHICKEN STRIPS. BACON AND CHEESE. Does it bother you, fragile soul, that I am free? FREE! The NoiseHush NX22 Stereo Headphones were great – much better than I thought they would be. I had recently reviewed the NX26 headphones, and was very impressed – they were just as good, if …
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Lip Lolly Lollipop
The Lip Lolly Lollipop is a pair of rather wrinkly lips that are waiting to be kissed. Or, if you have mean friends, they’re waiting to kiss the top of your head and force you to shave a patch of your hair to get it off. This strawberry flavored lollipop represents the disappearing freedom of speech – for with no lips, you cannot speak. Or, perhaps, it’s just another option for Valentine’s Day presents for that special special someone! Special special special! …
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Candy Stash Wallet
The Candy Stash Wallet is modeled after those sheets of wax paper with small drops of hardened liquid sugar on them, and is great for holding all of your cold hard cash. No, you can’t actually eat the candy studs, and why would you want to? Then, you’d just have a plain white wallet with no money in it. If you don’t eat the candy studs, you’ll have a colorful wallet with no money in it. This product is from World …
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Katapult Pen
The Katapult Pen is the perfect tool for getting detentions and annoying coworkers! With this innovative device, you can hit people with a blunt weapon, catapult small rocks and pieces of paper at people, and hit them again with a blunt weapon! What fun! That guy who put your stapler in Jello and is dating the woman that you’ve never talked to but have thought about talking to is going to feel the wrath of the Katapult Pen. Half pen, half …
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Zombie Survival Can Energy Drink
The Zombie Survival Can Energy Drink gives you that last boost of super energy that you need to run ahead of the horde of zombies. Tongues lashing out at your feet, rogue zombies hurling balls of ice cream, goth zombies piercing their faces – things can get pretty tough. Your survivor friends need you to be awake when you keep watch, and that’s why they bought you the Zombie Survival Can Energy Drink. Also, you’re holding a loaded shotgun with the …
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The Original Football Man Candle
The Original Football Man Candle is for when the bros are coming over – and not the ones that you met at the WE THINK SAMUS IS SEXY convention. (Man, that’s an awesome convention, isn’t it? They basically invented Zero Suit Samus at one of those.) Some guys from work want to come over and watch large men run with a ball until they get rocked to the core by other large men (Americans enjoy this) and listen to guys in …
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Heart Gelatin Mold
The Heart Gelatin Mold is anatomically correct, and only for the superior of mind. With this geeky mold, you can literally “eat a heart!” ”That was never a figurative saying. when would I say that I’m going to ‘eat a heart’? Creepo.” Did you know that cows have two stomachs? ”You’re trying to change the subject.” *Does a barber shop song and dance* The Heart Gelatin Mold is only $6, and allows you to make as many Jello hearts as you …
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Remote Control Rainbow Candles
Remote Control Rainbow Candles combine the old with the new – just like when I put all of the muffins that were made last week but weren’t sold with all of the muffins that we made this week! The antiquity of the candle has been combined with today’s wireless remote control shenanigans. Back in my day, if we wanted to get our candles to burn different colors, we’d have to travel deep into a cave filled with large rats and harvest …
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Rebel Alliance and Empire Star Wars Cufflinks
The Rebel Alliance and Empire Star Wars Cufflinks are hot out of the ThinkGeek oven! These geeky cufflinks are rhodium plated (I don’t know what that means but it sounds like something that gives you cancer) and are a surprising $59.99. I was shocked when I saw the price tag, and I must surmise that these are top quality cufflinks – only for the most elite businessmen. The Rebel Alliance and Empire Star Wars Cufflinks are available in evil Empire black …
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