Plush Shark Hat
The Plush Shark Hat is adorable, frightening, and funny at the same time. Not to disrespect the lady in the costume, but there must be a reason that she hasn’t gotten a higher acting job than pretending to be terrified while wearing a shark hat. (To be honest, she’s probably not an actor and is just a worker at Neatoshop.) The blank, vacant look in the shark’s eyes is what really makes the Plush Shark Hat awesome. How else can you …
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Ouchlet Bandaid Outlet Covers
The Ouchlet Bandaid Outlet Cover is saving dimwits everywhere from electrifying their brains! Of course, it’s also helpful for those trying to keep the mini geeks from sticking a fork in these convenient fork-sized holes, and we can’t make fun of them since they don’t know any better. Look – their dad is wearing an Adult Star Wars Bath Robe and stuffing his face with Bacon Frosting - it’s not like he’s going to show them the way to safety! He probably …
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Remote Control Tissue Box
The Remote Control Tissue Box seems, to me, to be a sick joke. (Get it? SICK joke? ”How did you get into my subconscious?”) But, seriously, this geeky RC toy is a sick, sick, joke. Hey, you know what would be awesome? If we drove the Remote Control Tissue Box over to that guy lying down in bed. Just watch him try to reach down and grab a tissue. *Man falls off of the bed* Ha! Did you – did you …
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Color Changing Umbrella
The Color Changing Umbrella from Firebox does exactly what the title implies: eats your domestic animals! Nah, nah, just messing with you – only the giant centipedes that I told you about before eat your kittens and puppies. What the Color Changing Umbrella actually does is let you brighten up the rainstorm with a bit of color! Unfortunately, the colors you see above are not LED produced, but the rain drops are coated with a white paint that becomes transparent when …
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Star Wars Adult Bath Robes
The Star Wars Adult Bath Robes give you the power of the force… while you’re lounging nude in your bathroom. What a wonderful idea! There are two types of these geeky garments: the black as night imperial robe, with the logo of the imperial forces on it, and the beige as beige light side garment, which has the jedi logo imprinted onto it. Just a note for those who are especially gullible: the super awesome lightsabers are not included, though they …
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Tabasco Spicy Chocolate
Tabasco Spicy Chocolate adds a powerful Falcon Punch to every bit of delicious chocolate – each piece has been endowed with the gift of a few precious drops of liquid fire. By liquid fire, I mean tabasco. I don’t want to make the Tabasco Spicy Chocolate seem too spicy – it’s certainly not as flame-inducing as its cousin the Super Hot Ghost Pepper Candy Balls – but it’s not to be taken lightly by those who are untrained in the ways …
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Ghost Pepper Super Hot Candy Balls
The Ghost Pepper super Hot Candy Balls are the hottest thing that you’ve ever tasted and will ever taste. If you don’t have a tongue that can handle spicy foods, this geeky product is not for you. These candy balls are covered in ghost pepper chili powder – this stuff is so spicy that there are warning labels telling you to wash your hands after you eat these, since the powder can burn your skin and eyes. Fire eaters start crying …
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Cupcake Jelly Beans
Cupcake Jelly Beans combine two of my favorite geeky snacks: jelly beans and centipede wafers cupcakes. These jelly beans are flavored like frosting covered cupcakes, and come in a super cool collectible tin that looks like a cupcake. The epitome of sugar delight, the Cupcake Jelly Beans will have small children hopping off the walls. ”Get down off those walls, boy! You’re leaving shoe marks!” Sorry, gramma. ”You’re going to be sorry when you can’t sit down for a week!” DON’T …
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Zombie Head Pencil Holder
The Zombie Head Pencil Holder is a… well… unique way of storing your pencils. *coughing* Who am I kidding THIS IS THE MOST AWESOME THING EVER I hope my boss doesn’t care. If he does, I suppose that it will have to go… I’ll just tell him that I quit very nicely. What? You thought I was going to give up my Zombie Head Pencil Holder? Consider this information: you can stick your pencils into the convenient pencil-sized holes in its …
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Astronaut Ice Cream Balls
The Astronaut Ice Cream Balls are the greatest space snack available to man! The other more developed and delicious space snacks are only on planets where they’ve been doing this “space” thing for quite a while. As in, since the beginning of their civilization. They make jokes about humans in their living rooms, laughing about how we’re still trying to grow plants in space. Also, about how we still get a kick out of drinking orange juice drops in a space …
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